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The Story of Colleen's Caps
Written 2/2005
Colleen's Caps are named after my mother Colleen Van Over. She was a great lady of extraordinary strength. It was a quiet strength that you may not have expected from her. Mom was a little shy and very conservative. When she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer, she had been sick for some time. Because of witnessing family and friends go through treatment, she was obviously scared and didn't want to go through chemo. This is a natural reaction for anyone facing such a ruthless disease. But, looking into the eyes of her adoring Grandchildren, Mom decided to fight this disease and fight it hard. Right before her treatment began, we had decided that we were going to cut off my long hair and have it made into a wig for her. But the chemo took its toll fast on her and her hair was falling out in large clumps after only one treatment. I went on the hunt to find her a wig, and I had met an angel. I found this wonderful woman who ran a wig shop in NJ and she helped us find the perfect wig for Mom. It was a human hair wig and Mom joked that she was going to wear it even after she was better. She also provided us with a plain little cotton cap. We didn't think much of the cotton cap at the time. Later that night, when we were home alone, my mom asked me to do the hardest thing I ever had to. She asked me to help her shave her head. I know how it must have pained her to ask for that kind of assistance. Mom was very independent and proud and I saw in her face that it was time to face reality. The fun of putting on wigs and being out together that day was all wiped away by the feel of a razor in my hand. I remember the impact of how I felt at that very moment, of how our roles were suddenly switched. I was no longer a little girl looking to my mom for strength. She was the one looking at me to be brave and have the answers that we both wanted to hear. I could just feel both of our hearts being ripped in two.
Fighting back tears and putting on my best "Everything is OK face", I shaved my mothers head in silence. It was a quiet and private moment, a rite of passage when the daughter has to care for her mother. All I could think was that this wasn't fair, why her, make this stop! I was so very angry because I was so used to fixing things and I couldnt fix her.
Unlike me, my mother never complained. She got herself up and went to dialysis, then to chemo, then off to radiation on some days, and then she went to work. She was a tough little trouper and she lived her life to the fullest that she could while battling this disease. As time passed, she realized that she wore the little cotton cap more often than her wonderful wig. These wigs are hard to keep up. They have to be hand washed and air-dried. Sometimes it could take up to two days for it to dry. Plus, it could prove to hot and itchy and it wasn't anything that you would want to sleep in. My daughter called her cap "Moms hat". With this disease, you dont just loose you hair. You also loose you eyebrows and eye lashes. All things that are considered to be part of your beauty. With nothing on your head or face, you can feel very exposed and vulnerable. Having this little cap on seems to take that feeling away. Plus, Mom was always worried that her grandchildren would be upset to see her without her hair, but no one even noticed when she had on her cap.
My mother went on to beat her cancer. Armed with her wig and her little cotton cap, she fought the cancer with a special kind of dignity that only she possessed. Never complaining, she was tough and she was brave and she was strong. Mom went into remission, but only a few short months later, her heart had had enough, and she was gone.
Sitting in the hospitals with my mother, I had seen many people knitting. I wish that I had known how to then. It seemed a wonderful way to work out stress and to help pass the time. I wish that I could have made her a cap. I know that I couldnt have made her better, but I would have felt like I was helping her fight. The cap is such an important tool in the fight against this horrible disease.
So, almost three years ago, I gave 27 inches of my hair to "Locks of Love", and I learned how to knit. I can now make these caps for many people and I can teach people how to make them. You can make them furry, make them sparkle, make them conservative. However you like, just make them with love. When someone is sick, they loose their hair, not who they are. So make these caps for who you need to, however they need you to. And I hope and pray that one day, we won't have to make them at all.
Thank you all! , Carole Ferguson
Please feel free to copy this, share it, e-mail it, or fax it to whomever you desire. Many patterns have copy write rules, but for this pattern I don't. I don't want to make any money off of this pattern. I want you to make this pattern with love and hope & prayers for finding a cure.
As always, The Celtic Knot Yarn Shop does all we can to support the Komen Foundation in its search for a cure. Remember, October is coming up in a few short months! Start getting yourself ready to be a part of our "Race for the Cure" team. We want to triple our team membership and double our donation from last year. Who are you racing for? I race in memory of my cousin, Tonianne D'Esposito, My Aunt Dottie, my mother-in-law, Kaye Ferguson, and my mom, Colleen Van Over. I race for all of our customers who are fighting this disease and for all of those who beat it. If your are healthy, think about yourself anyway. I race for me, so Hailey won't have to be without her mother and I race for her, so maybe her generation won't have to race at all.
We will take all donated caps and split them between Maryland Central Oncology and we will donate another large bag of caps at the "Race for the Cure" in October.
KNIT PATTERN OF COLLEEN'S CAP
Materials : Size 7 16" circular needle
Approx 150 yards of soft cotton yarn
(cotton fleece, evita, etc..)
size 7 DPNs
1 tapestry needle
This is a simple rolled brim hat, which is perfect for beginners. You can also change the brim by using 2x2 ribbing, seed stitch or any other boarder stitch you may like. When adding any novelty yarns, take into consideration the treatment the patient is receiving. Certain drugs and positions of radiation can make the top of the head VERY sensitive. Even the smallest bit of novelty yarn can feel like sandpaper. When in doubt, use a nice soft cotton. A cotton with an acrylic blend or a wool blend is my recommendation because it helps to keep the shape of the hat. You need these caps in the winter because of the cold and you need these caps in the summer because most places such as, restaurants, movies, etc. have the air conditioning on very high.
Cast On 99 sts and join in the round being careful not to twist
Knit in the round for 5-6 inches
Decrease rounds begin here:
Knit 9 sts, knit 2tog, repeat to the end.
Knit next round
Knit 8sts, k2tog repeat to the end.
Knit next round
Continue decreasing this way and then switch to DPNS when sts get to tight.
Continue to decrease in the same manner until very few sts remain. Cut yarn leaving a 12" tail.
With tapestry needle, pick up the few remaining sts from needle and pull down through center of cap. Weave in ends.
The following is our Crochet version of Colleen's Cap.
This pattern is provided by a Free Site on the web. We are Currently developing our own version, but we will be using this on for now.
Materials:
- Yarn, preferably a soft cotton
- Crochet hook, size N
- Something to mark rounds with
1: Ch 3, join with sl stitch to form ring. Ch 1, 6 sc in ring, (Do not join.) Place marker in last sc of each round.
2: 2 sc in each sc. (12 sc)
3: (1 sc in next sc, 2 sc in next sc) around.
4: (1 sc in each of next 2 sc, 2 sc in next sc) around. (24 sc)
5: (2 sc in next sc, 1 sc in each of next 3 sc) around.
6: (1 sc in each of next 4 sc, 2 sc in next sc) around. (36 sc)
7: (2 sc in next sc, 1 sc in each of next 5 sc) around. (42 sc) (You can place the marker at the end of this row and keep it there until you do a few more rows. That way, if the hat is too tight or too loose, you can rip back to the marker and either add or subtract stitches from round 8 to adjust the size of the hat.)
8: (1 sc in each of next 6 sc, 2 sc in next sc) around. (48 sc)
9: (2 sc in next sc, 1 sc in each of next 7 sc) around. (54 sc)
[If necessary to make the crown wide enough: (1 sc in each of next 8 sc, 2 sc in next sc) around.]
10: Sl stitch into next sc, ch 1, sc in each stitch around, join with sl st to ch 1.
11-23: Ch 1, sc in each sc around, join with sl st to ch 1. (Try on your hat now and see if it's long enough for you. Add a row or two if it isn't long enough. Or take a row off if it's too long.)
24: Ch 1, (1 sc in each of next 8 sc, 2 sc in next sc) around. Join with sl st to ch 1. [If you added a row after row 9, then do this instead: [(2 sc in next sc, 1 sc in each of next 9 sc) around. Join with sl st to ch 1.]
24-27: Ch 1, sc in each sc around. Join with sl st to ch 1.
Fasten off. (These last 4 rounds should curl up to make the brim.)
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